I realise it’d be easy to read this blog and maybe think that somehow I have dealt with the disappointment of my plans being shattered by coronavirus by simply reading Scriptures and writing positive blog posts. So here’s a little piece that’s simply a ‘reality check’ to let you into a bit of what happens behind the scenes of my life.
I’m not posting this for sympathy (although I’m not dissing right-hearted sympathy) or as a cry for specific help… as you’ll discover I have good help in my life already. But I’m posting this because another word for ‘truth’ in the Scriptures is ‘reality’, and so we could say as Jesus did that ‘reality will set you free’. Here’s a bit of my reality, in the hope that it brings you a bit of freedom to travel your own journey with God.
When the news that my trip with Tearfund to Bangladesh was cancelled, I was devastated. So many things had come into alignment for the trip to happen, I’d received a stack of direction from Holy Spirit which all seemed to be leading me there, and people had donated, and I had spent, a lot of money to get the trip set up. Added to all that I’d left my home and my job, work that I truly loved. There were many aspects to the disappointment I faced but I really did grieve – anger, tears, fear – the lot.
I also reached out to trusted friends.
I took time with God. Sometimes just angrily stating why I thought He should’ve warned me. Sometimes just sitting in confusion and trying to work through, what is going on?
I read the Bible. I read the Psalms. I read some bits of books (but I’m not a great reader so not a lot).
I spoke to friends some more. I asked people to pray. I went on walks. I went on drives (before lockdown).
I am still journeying. I don’t have all the answers yet, but I have some hints of answers to some things. There are treasures I’m discovering here. There are also still moments of sadness. I am still talking to friends about it. It seems to be getting better but there may be more stages yet to go through.
Although I might look and sound stoic, I’m actually pretty emotionally expressive and I feel things deeply. And grieving, and disappointment, and emotions, are messy. And I’m not through it yet.
So this post is about the honesty. This is about saying leaders or whatever aren’t always ‘there yet’. This is about saying I still love Jesus but there’s hurts that aren’t healed yet. This is about reality: so may you discover the freedom of being real with God and with trusted others. May you know the space to not be ok sometimes. And may you and I discover how to journey on and be made strong in the Saviour’s love.
Prayer pointers: I’d love you to pray for me…
> That I will live well and find contentment in the days I’m in
> That I’ll know what opportunities to take in the days to come
Adventures with God 
Hello from all of the Plunketts xx
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This is the reality I had imagined. I will pray for you Jonny that you find some answers. 🙏🙏
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Perhaps I should have said this before, but when your mission was cancelled, my first thought was of David, whom you mentioned in an earlier post. He was anointed King of Israel and spent years being chased by a murderous Saul before God fulfilled his promise to David. He truly had a hard time . I have also witnessed something similar in the lives of people around me – following a clear word from God that appeared to turn into a dead end. I am so sorry that it is so difficult for you but I know that God does not lie and even when your life seems to have utterly fallen apart, and I have had personal experience of that, things will turn around in God’s timing. You may never know the full reasons for what has happened, but one day you will be able to say that God’s plan for you was perfect. I do not say that glibly for it is not an easy word to hear when you are in the depths. Be sure that you do not weep alone.
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Jonny, thank you for your honesty and for being real. Although our journeys of adventure were going to be very different, I can feel the grief you felt when all the plans made were overturned, you find yourself asking God ‘what next’ ‘did I hear you right’ or did you mean yes, but not yet! How did we not see this coming?
You are an amazing man of God, and you know all things come together for the good of those who love Him. Thank God that we can put our faith and trust in Him, He meets our needs and helps us out of the slimy pit. Journey on, keep making discoveries, may you find contentment, know that opportunities will present themselves and God will lead the way. I listened to Andy Croft speaking recently about patience – patient endurance, he spoke about Job who lost everything but remained faithful to God. Job endured with patience and was restored.
Love, peace and joy to you.
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